The week that sucked.

Last week was one of *those* weeks.

Ya know...the kind where you realize that you really don't wanna grow up and face reality, but you have too because its staring you right in the face? yeah...one of those weeks.

It all began the weekend before when we went on our second round of house hunting, and grew in intensity on Monday morning when we got a phone call from the Realtor, one which began with the words *this is a really difficult and uncomfortable call for me to ave to make*

Ah...........stop right there. I got that feeling I had an idea what he was going to say, and I hoped, no prayed to God it wasn't what I thought it was. Sadly...I was right. Our son, age 11 who has Asperger's had lifted a very expensive item from one of the houses we had looked at. This sent my week into a tail spin of emotions of which I cannot even begin to describe here because I have my body blog to update tonight as well (3 blogs....limited time schedule, this one got first dibs lol).

I don't think that up until this point I have ever been faced with that much negative emotion on a parenting level. I usually am able to maintain myself and stay in the positive realm of things, but this without a doubt sent me over the edge , and it was really scary if you must know the truth.

Why you ask? Granted...he stole. Kids that age steal sometimes. True...and true. The problem here is, this is not the first, second third or fourth time...you get the picture. The thing of it is, he KNOWS it's wrong. He can sit there and tell you verbatim what we have drilled into his head over and over again about the subject and it doesn't matter. I would go into details, but it seriously would take me forever and honestly it needs to be on the autism blog...not here.

My problem now is, I'm frustrated, mad and hurt. Frustrated with him because he keeps doing it....mad at myself for trusting him again in a sitch like that, and hurt because of the way people keep trying to tell me he will grow out of this, and someday it will change. Granted...I'm not sitting here trying to be the pessimist. On the contrary, I'm being realistic in that I know my kid well enough to know that he cannot be trusted. The thing of it is, the things he takes are ridiculous. He doesn't always take high priced items, 9 times out of 10, its small petty crap. I have a friend whose brother suffers the same disorder, he is 6 yrs older than Dyl and he still gets patted down when they go places.

I guess what I am trying to say is, I have come to a realization. Dyl will grow and mature....but not like other kids. He will learn to cope in certain ways, but he is never going to fully be what other kids will grow to be, mostly my other kids. There is a good chance that he won't ever leave our house, and if he does i can tell you right now he will have a tough time holding down a job. I would go again into details but I can't (time lol)

So i say all this to put my last post into perspective. I wasn't ready last week to talk about it one more time. I had rehashed it to the proper people 3 times already that day and I couldn't handle one more thought about the entire incident.

To make matters worse...the item he took was expensive....VERY expensive and the people not only wanted it back, they wanted a brand new one back (to the tune of $150).

So....the rest of the week was spent choosing a few more houses to see and kind of re-eval'ing what we want in our new home, especially in light of last weeks incident . Because of the loan we are getting, we most likely will have to get a new(er) house. I found the PERFECT house for 8 kids, alas....it has these mega power towers not 300 yards off the back of the house (maybe more like 100 they seem very close! :( )

The layout of this house was so PERFECT...but I cannot in good conscience buy a house and take that risk with my kids lives, whether those towers pose a threat to ones body/health or not. That said, we have decided to see if we can find the builder and get that exact same house elsewhere. We really would like to change school districts but don't want to move too far because of the teenager's volunteer job in the summer. So the house hunt continues. We have 5 possible's this week, I'm not holding my breath LOL. I know what I want, and its none of the above. I will tell you this, I never in a million years realized how much room we really do need. I don't want to live in a house where people can hide its so big, but seriously, you would have to have a pretty huge house in order to do that with 10 people, kwim? I always figured that 2000 sq ft would suffice....um, the one I saw that was 2000 sq ft plus a basement felt like a tuna can (still). So in my mind anything under 2500 at this point is a waste of time.

In the meantime, I am using my spare time (HA) to get my future rental house in order. I am in the process of fixing the broken kitchen floor tiles. I am half way done but had to stop thanks to dentist appt's today and tomorrow morning so renovations will continue tomorrow afternoon. The kids have heard me say all day *don't step on mommy's squares!!* even Mr. C steps around them (he's a genius....what can I say? ;) lol) Dean texted me after he left for work today and said me fixing kitchen tiles was....and I quote *now that's HOT*

LOL!! is it any wonder I drool over that boy???!!! ahhhhhhhhhhhh.

With that said, I must go now. You know I need a shower and I def need the bed, this is one tired mama. ttfn...